what's yours?

Salam..

Once..some time ago, I chatted with UH. He advised me to choose a particular area, or scope that I am interested in and focus to develop that scope for the benefit of Islam.

Unfortunately, up to now..I still have not found one particular area and settle on it yet. I feel bad. Kind of like I don't really have much purpose in life.

It hurts even more when you see other people, who aren't in tarbiyyah, actually specialising in something which is totally different from their career and getting many followers. Imagine if we, who has fikrah can do something as such too.

Anyway, while I'm still searching for mine..what about you people? Have all of you specialized in a particular area yet?

Oh..btw, example of specialization is photography, commited blogging, motivational talks, business etc etc.

tenatnya masyarakat kita

Assalamualaikum sahabat sekalian. Benarlah masyarakat kita hari ini sangat tenat.

Hari ni saya ke bandar dengan ayah, ibu dan adik-adik. Memandangkan saya tiada apa yang nak dibeli, saya merelakan diri duduk di luar kedai menjaga barang-barang sementara yang lain-lain membeli barang di kedai berhampiran. Duduk saya, bertentangan dengan jalan kecil di dalam bandar besar, tempat laluan masyarakat ke kiri dan ke kanan.

Sedap sungguh gelaran yang diberi oleh kerajaan negeri kepada bandar itu. "Bandaraya Islam", "Serambi Mekah"...Tetapi, penduduknya tidak ubah seperti penduduk di negeri lain.

Allah saja yang tahu..hati ini kasihan melihat masyarakat yang semakin tenat dengan maksiat dan jahiliyah. Seluar jeans ketat + baju kemeja ketat, pendek dan tidak berlengan + tudung singkat mengikut fesyen sekarang.

Rata-rata golongan perempuan memakai tudung dengan sanggul tinggi di atas kepala, dibutangkan pula di bahagian leher sehingga nampak bentuk telinga dan leher mereka. Tidak kira umur..dari muda sehingga yang tua...entah di mana cantiknya fesyen sebegitu.

Itu belum dikira yang berjalan berpegangan tangan, rambut yang hitam sudah menjadi seperti rambut dan janggut singa.

Jika dulu, saya sekadar mendengar "masyarakat kita sudah tenat". Kalau melihat pun, sekadar melihat di internet. Tapi, sekarang...sejak pulang ke Malaysia, ternyata masyarakat kita memang sudah tenat.

Usah pandang jauh-jauh. Keluarga kita sendiri masih dibelenggu perkara yang sama. Sedih juga apabila ibu mahu membeli syampu "Clear", keluaran Unilever. Saya katakan pada ibu, "Produk Yahudi ni". Katanya, "Memang produk Yahudi tapi nak buat macam mana. Ibu tak boleh pakai syampu jenama lain. Habis rambut jadi rosak."

Adik-adik juga sudah pandai mengenakan tudung yang sedikit singkat. Untung mereka masih memakai baju lengan panjang & tidak bersanggul tinggi seperti trend hari ini.

Sekarang, apa yang saya boleh buat ialah menjadi contoh yang baik untuk adik-adik. Kerana adik-adik seperti belum bersedia untuk mendengar 'ceramah'. Kadang-kadang, qudwah lebih tajam daripada kata-kata yang penuh dengan pesanan kan? Saya tahu mereka sedar akan perubahan saya. Mereka pernah tanya, "Akak sekarang senyap sejak balik. Dulu tak macam ni." Saya katakan kepada mereka sambil senyum, "Tak ada apa nak cakap, lebih baik diam."

Ya Allah yang Maha Kuasa. Lindungi kami dari fitnah dunia. Lindungi kami dari nikmat keseronokan dunia. Jadikan kami orang-orang yang mencintai dakwah. Ameen.

Harapan padaMu subur kembali

Subhanallah...

As I read through all my previous entries, I found myself asking to myself, where has that strong person gone?

Most of my previous post are filled by 'ummi's' nasihah. Filled with one short verse from the Quran. Filled with the desire to totally follow Rasulullah S.A.W. in every aspect of life. Filled with the hunger to be close to Allah. Filled with the passion to become a better daie.

But the me today, unfortuantely enough, still have problems struggling with jahiliyah. Still have problems coping up with mutabaah amal. And have not even the slightest reflection of a daie..

Astaghfirullah.. astaghfirullah..astaghfirullah..

I wonder how have I fallen this far?

Having read through those entries, I now feel thankful that I did write those back then. At least, today, I know that I can be better than who I am today. And I will continue striving hard, to be that strong person again, and hopefully even better. May Allah give me strength to do that. And, may my rindu to Rasulullah S.A.W. subur kembali..

start of a new beginning

Assalamualaikum

So, you've read the mail huh? :)

Anyway, I hope you're all ok with the plan. And even if you do not want to participate, it's ok. I'm fine with it.

There are things that I want to write down and want people to know, and at the same time I don't want people to know who's talking.

But at this stage of life, I strongly believe that I will need support. And amazingly enough, when I want to talk about something, the names that will pop up in my mind are yours. I don't mind who I talk to, who ever among you are available, I will reach out to. And though I don't totally know everyone of you by heart, and that I've only met some of you a number of times since we know each other, I have a strong feeling that I can trust you, and that you'll be there for me if I need you, and that I'll be more than willing to be there for you if you have any problems.

Well, you might not feel the same way, it's up to you, really. But I want all of you to know that this is how I feel about you. So, thank you so much :)

Anyway, for some reason, I have a strong feeling of going for Jaulah to the east coast sometime when I'm back for holidays. Who's available there aih? I want to spend some days at AN's house. If FA and IZ's there, I'd like to stop by too. If TH available, I'd like to come over to your house too. This is just my plan so far. Still a long way to go.

And oh, I'm still thinking of a retreat at PD some time when we are all available. How would you guys like that?

:) i'm excited.